By: Fidel de Sousa Montiel (Grade 4)

In 1939, I, the 16-year old jew Jocub, saw the blood red swastika for the first time on my way to Munich by train on vacation. It was the 31st of August.

When the train passed the flag, all passengers started talking about the nacional-socialist party, better known as the Nazis. Rumors of burnt synagogues, jews killed for no reason other than the thousands being kicked out of cities scared me and my parents, Lucia and Mario, because we were jews, even though not very religious. Our train would arrive in Munich in 2 hours,. I was scared.

In 1989, many years after the war, I wonder what would have happened if we hadn’t gone to Munich. Would Mom and Dad be alive to see my children grow? Now I realize that if we had stayed in Poland it would have been the same…

Back in 1939, when we arrived at Munich, we saw Nazi guards and policemen screaming “JUDEN RAUS”. There was a body on the ground. It was my aunt Anna. She was bleeding and coughing up blood. My father went to confront the guard, as he was shot in the stomach. Momma started running. We found a taxi. We got in, started crying and we started to speak in yiddish. The taxi driver realized that and called a Nazi guard, who arrested us, but Momma had a diamond ring and about 3500 zlotys to give, so she bribed him to take us to Warsaw safely.

In 1989, I can see that going to Warsaw was a horrible choice as, the next day, the Nazis started the war by invading Poland, and were sent to Auschwitz. Momma died in the gas chamber while I managed to survive. I escaped on the 21st of July of 1944, and now I live happily with 2 children, Miguel and Anna, named after my mother. In all these years, I have been diagnosed with depression and survivor’s guilt. Now, I feel lonely and that is why I just cut my wrist. 

                                    Suicide note by Jocub Smidt

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